“Top Five Reasons CBS Won’t Allow a 3rd World Contestant on “Survivor” (February 23, 2001)

5. Eating anything that moves won’t be a problem. Not cooking it first will be.

4. He might win, because he’s been eating.

3. He might actually makes white boys speechless with his extensive knowledge of living off the land. As we all know, a speechless white boy is bad for ratings.

2. He might win, then split his money with all his other 3rd World buddies who have been hiding in the bushes and trees with food all that time.

1. All the white girls might end up pregnant.

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