Top Five Unique Things About Philippine Porno* Films” (October 16, 2000)

5. There’s always the sounds of a rooster crowing and some vendor selling balut in the background, mixed in with all the hot moaning.

4. You’ll notice the actors’ tsinelas (slippers) never fall off their feet. Strong toes!

3.  The best ones are usually still only on Betamax tapes, since they’re easy to hide when your mom suddenly comes into your bedroom looking for “the scissors”.

2. You never get tired of hearing the lines, “Ang sarap mo, darling! Sige na Rock my world, ay putang ina!” Improvisation at its best.

1. The camera crew can never keep those big ass mosquitos off the money shot.

*Disclaimer: All of this information was obtained from secondhand sources and were told to me in strict confidence. Rex was in the seminary during the Betamax years.

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